An Emergency Wakes Me

Day 555.

Yesterday I woke to the news that George is injured and may need surgery.

He’s in Switzerland. I woke with a start, took the call, coherent and tapping away on computer keyboard, efficient, snapping into action. Adam opened one eye watching me spring into action as my old self and gently and sweetly asked. “Oh hello, where have you been?”

I sat up through the night for news of the MRI. The signal that there is to be surgery brings to me a spectacular level of high function and I am booked onto a rare air mile flight by dawn. Thanks Luke!

So here I am, on another plane. But this time, I do not yearn for Luke. Instead, my systems are connected to George - reaching to my boy that we are on our way. Yes, we, for Luke is with me. He died aged 23 and the only seat available out of LA was 23A!! But this is all about George.

A friend of our crowd died last week, quite unexpectedly, after a routine operation. My friends are new to such events but I have never taken any surgery lightly. I know that this, however routine a surgery, brings mortality risks. And so I have no sadness for Luke’s loss, as all my systems are towards George’s survival. Every cell praying to any power that can help or hear me. Every thought towards a favorable outcome.

My body hums and vibrates - the mission crystal clear - George can not die. It’s as if my system has put it’s fingers in its ears and is chanting “George will be fine, George will come through.” I am compelled to be present and so I am compelled to fly to Zurich with no notice, after two hours sleep, in an economy seat, to be at his side. Adam assisting, supportive, amazing. Just what I need - is what he is.

I feel useful, I feel good. I feel our family, and, I feel Luke by our side. United by our mission. I am awoken.