The Right Brain Food

Day 649.

What if Luke was only happy high?

I think sobriety was a constant agony for him, as it is for many.

What if he had some brain disfunction, a connection that wasn’t quite right, that the self medication fixed, albeit not quite fixed?

I think marijuana wasn’t the right ‘food’ for his brain. Maybe that’s why he used it so heavily - because no matter how much he used - it never hit the spot.

What if, like in German hospitals, one could use kinesiology to muscle test which drug was the “right” one? Would the user require less? Just as with antibiotics, the end goal would be to test for the correct antibiotics and so require a smaller dose.

Is that why some drug users cope so well their entire lives on drugs - they found the right one? A smaller dose of the ‘right’ drug would maintaining them well, medicating them for what they need to cope.

I know this is bonkers thinking - but why not?

From the description of Oxy usage, I know it’s not the same effect as heroin, despite the fact that they are both opioids. I know personally that both Fentanyl and Dellauded are not the same in feeling as Oxy.

Heroin never suited Luke. He had tried it before and was very unwell. He told me. But if that was all he could get... the same with weed...

Was he seeking to self medicate a disfunction?

He was loud, spoke loud, was often clumsy but not when he was riding, or in the energy field of a horse - he was different. Did horses provide the right brain food?

What if that was it? I can’t think this to its conclusion, I’m exhausted and had too many Negronis to complete my thinking. (Obviously not the ‘food’ for me.)

But I will ponder further on this.